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Book Review – The State of Affairs by Esther Perel

The State of Affairs

Esther Perel


RRP: $37.99

I’m not a heavy reader of non-fiction. I’m not sure why but often it feels like “homework”.  When this one came across my desk however I had to say YES.

Esther Perel has given a compelling TED talk on affairs (view it here) – she is someone who’s opinions on infidelity are challenging the practice of marital counselling around the world.

If you have time, watch the talk above – you’ll know straight away whether you’d like to explore her thinking more immediately (or not!).

Opinions aside this book is very readable. Perel uses real examples from her practice to help highlight her conclusions and is very frank about what has worked (and not) and why she believed this process worked for those whose relationships had been challenged by infidelity.

I put this book down prepared to rethink some of my previous opinion and more firmly set in others. If you are interested in humans and how we both love and destroy each other you’ll likely find this a fascinating and well researched read.

About the Author

Psychotherapist Esther Perel is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern love. Fluent in nine languages, she holds a therapy practice in New York City and serves as an organizational consultant for Fortune 500 companies around the world. Her celebrated TED talks have garnered more than 18 million views and her bestseller Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence became a global phenomenon translated into 24 languages. Her second book The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity is due out October 2017 published by Yellow Kite in the UK and Harper Collins in the US. Esther is also an executive producer and the host of the Audible original audio series “Where Should We Begin?” which launches on iTunes Autumn 2017.

About Esther Perriam

Esther Perriam
Esther Perriam is the General Manager at Eldernet. She’s worked in the business for over 10 years and has been lucky to visit many of the older person’s services around the country. She’s never short of an opinion on…pretty much anything. Esther really loves reading and you’ll see plenty of book reviews authored by her. As a mother of two small children there’s not much free time but if there is she also enjoys cooking (for grown-ups, not the kids!) and anything beach related in her spare time. Esther has presented at conferences around New Zealand and is happy to be contacted in regards to speaking or presenting at your event.

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